For the first time ever, I am going to have a guest blogger…my wife Vickie. We have been on vacation together and have had some great discussions about a million topics, but mainly marriage.
We have discussed our own marriage – great memories and even some not so great memories. We have discussed and prayed for other peoples’ marriages. We have even counseled over the phone on this vacation fighting to save other people’s marriages long distance!
I’ll tell you again…Fight For Your Marriage!
Marriage Wars by Vickie Flockhart
We are ending one of the greatest trips I have ever been on. A simple trip, no shopping, no bowling or putt putt, no sporting events. Just my husband and I hanging out, talking, watching sunsets (we don’t do sunrises! lol), watching movies, swimming, laying in the sun and sitting by the ocean. Resting and enjoying each other’s company.
Every couple needs this. Every couple needs that time to focus on each other and just talk with no interruptions.
Every couple faces the attacks from the world and from the enemy on their marriage. They forget why they fell in love, they forget how to talk, they forget how important it is to spend time together.
They forget why it is important to fight to stay married. It becomes too easy to file for divorce, throw it all
away and walk away. Marriages are discarded like old shirts because something new and prettier is
available. It’s too easy to walk away from commitment.
I watched a movie recently called “Bride Wars.” In this movie, Kate Hudson and Anne Hathaway star as two best friends who grow up dreaming of the “perfect” wedding. You know, the type in fairytales – gorgeous dress, best venue, prettiest flowers, awesome cake, famous wedding planner on hand – everything to make it “perfect.” I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with having a gorgeous and memorable wedding day but I did think to myself that many marriages would be saved if the time, energy, research, attention to every detail, focus, etc… was put into the actual marriage as went into the wedding day.
And let’s cover another detail…the children involved. No one walks away from divorce unharmed but the kids suffer the most. Their entire world is turned upside down, everything as they know it changes. Holidays turn into “every other one with Mom”, weekend visitation, absent Dads (or Moms) and worst of all, the kids walk around carrying the guilt and wondering what they did or didn’t do to destroy their parents’ marriage. Don’t fool yourself, the children ALWAYS suffer in a divorce.
I guess in summary, I would just encourage you to do everything humanly possible to save your marriage. Put up safeguards and do things early on to strengthen your marriage and prevent you from being such easy prey. Examples: be active in church (more than just showing up on Sunday mornings) Be involved in Bible study/Small Groups; Serve in your church; be faithful in your own personal time with God; date your spouse; do things like write love notes; talk and laugh together; reminisce about why, where and how you fell in love.
Most importantly, view your marriage as the valuable gift that it is and determine in your heart that you and your spouse will treat it with care and use it to bring glory to God!
Be committed to your marriage…don’t let the enemy destroy another family – YOURS! Claim Gods promise in Jeremiah 29:11 for your marriage and your family today!